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Fireplace

from Grapefruit by Kiran Leonard

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lyrics

lagavulin
the old photographs that i kept
lagavulin
the dents in the bed where you slept
lagavulin
how
how can i know what the lights reveal
and sift through the debris to find what was real

little darling
the damp of the grass where we kissed
little darling
the ribbon that curled round your wrist
little darling
how
how did it fumble and burst on the rocks
left to decay and thrown to the flocks
and how can i know if the sycamore talks

i should have known
it was not within you to have cared
too outgrown
to accept it was not what we shared
i clasped the roots
and repeated the things that it said

how could i know that the fear remained
and fight to decode the terror you'd gained
your weakness was how you enjoyed the unknown
now you sleep through the days and the nights alone

i miss the house
and the thin layer of frost on the panes
and spite my youth
and the sore emptiness of my veins
in spite of all
i cannot quite remember your name

how did i cope when i found you weren't there
and toil with the truth that you never did care
and won't come to lie at my fireplace
evelyn closed her eyes saw the light turned to face

how could i know if the cracks revealed
the dark tenderness of the sting and yield
rinsed from the days of the old baptist hall
the long summer haze and the bat and ball
and everything goes down the hole in the sink
when you're numb and there's not been enough to drink
died in the night just to sleep through the days
but won't you come back to my fireplace

and how will i come to the end of the bridge
that i found myself at when i fell off the ridge
sleep through the days cause i've got time to kill
and hope that i wake with my body laid still
just to escape all the words in my head
'evelyn' on my lips as i climb out of bed
and when i'm awake i just scream for release
and i toil in my sleep but the sleep brings me peace
so i won't shed tears if i just cease to be
and i don't mind much if you don't long for me
i'll learn to forgive all the memories you bring
when you burnt all my letters with your wedding ring
and yet i still care and i'd hold you closely
thankful and patient through sweet misery
we all got in suits and we wished you the best
but still i wait for you to be put to rest

credits

from Grapefruit, released March 25, 2016

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Kiran Leonard England, UK

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